Wednesday, 23 May 2007

Though the snow was crew-ell

Having tired of the Brussel's sprout diet, the Shampoo-Free-Hair Program, and the unwashed-jeans-a-thon, I am currently participating in the Seasonality Challenge. This entails ignoring the realities of meteorological change and insisting that Winter doesn't kick in until the 1st of June. Because it is not Winter, because, according to the luminaries at Seasonality Challenge HQ, it is now Autumn, and because Autumn is all about flitting around in flimsy cardigans, gathering in the acorns, and watching the apples ripen, Hôtel Harlot hasn't turned on its heater yet. No heater til Winter. No roast chestnuts either. Or bedsocks. Or rollicking garblings of "Good King Wencesles", though the snow was crew-ell.

Given that we are at the sultry zenith of subtropical Autumn for another week, Seasonality Challenge or no, I am obliged to say that it is jolly freezing. The digits have been lobbying for a pair of mittens for five days now. But it would be an affront to the autumnity of Autumn for me to capitulate. Be strong, wee fingers. Next week we'll be girt, nose to toe, in ski-suit.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

I imagine you find the chilly Autumn air quite bracing and that it stimulates the grey matter nicely.

I have to know this: do girls in Melbourne wear singlets with scarfs and do you have that horrible trend of short shorts with opaque stockings?

TimT said...

Just like tree rings, you can accurately tell how far into the autumn/winter season it is by looking at the scarfs people wear. Early to mid-autumn, people will insouciantly wrap them around themselves once or twice; mid to late autumn, the scarfs will gradually increase in size, swathing themselves around their host-entities until the humans have become entirely subsumed into the scarf (eyes and occasionally nose will point vertically into the air indicating their presence). Of course, it is theoretically possible for the scarf to increase in size indefinitely, although I myself have not yet seen any practical examples of this. It is possible that, given time, the symbiotic host-scarf relationship could evolve in quite remarkable ways.

Another distinctive Melbourne autumn/winter phenomenon are the football families you see in great numbers on the weekends, all wearing identical coloured scarves/beanies travelling to either Spencer Street Station or Jolimont for whatever game is on, rather like you may see other families go to the zoo, or the movies, or to a play...

MissE said...

*waves* long time (in blogland) reader first time commenter ...

I'm also doing the Autumn until June 1st thing. Cardigans over tees, no extra blankets, no heaters.

The way I figure it, it's only going to get colder, and if you're bringing out the big guns now, how will you get through August?

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Herr Tim, for that beautiful piece of seasonal scene setting. I feel almost as if I was in Melbourne right now.

I made myself a scarf (one of the thick ones), but I haven't got around to casting it off. Well, to be honest, I can't figure out the diagram which tells me how to cast it off. If you, oh linkmeister, can link me to a better one, I'll be very grateful (bearing in mind that I am very stupid when it comes to this sort of thing). I have another scarf I'm supposed to make for a friend, which will be a skinnier number, I think. My sister is in her skinny scarf, upgraded to thick scarf when we went on a drive up to the Hunter Valley for my mother's birthday last week.
I used to be unable to wear scarves, because I don't like anything around my neck, but then when I was in Montreal I had to- before then I also only ever wore skirts and dresses.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Chesty Larue, your prize pack from Seasonality Challenge HQ will arrive in the mail shortly.

Karen, no, no singlets with scarves round these parts. This is not the kind of weather you want to mess about in with bare elbows. I have been rather alarmed, though, to see a prevalence of barely shod feet. The lassies sensibly swaddle themselves in overcoats and scarves, and then insist in walking around in thongs, or flimsy little ballet slides with no hosiery underneath. I wouldn't mind, except that it makes me sympathetically cold.

To cast off, do two normal plain stitches. Of those two stitches, take the loop furthest away from the needle's pointy end, pull it over the top of the other stitch, and slip it off the end of the needle. This will leave you with one stitch on the needle. Do another plain stitch, so that there are two stitches again, and repeat as above.

Tim, it's the Collingwood striped long johns that I like.

Anonymous said...

Why can't the instruction booklets be written so clearly? Will cast off tonight. Thanks muchly. As many mistakes as I've made, the scarf's got to be more effective that wrapping a sarong around my shoulders!
The thongs are happening here too- with those footless tights/leggings. Personally my biggest fashion dilemma at the moment is how many holes a garment can have in it before one can no longer wear it outside respectably. Of course at home the number of permissable holes is limited only by the imagination!

Alextricity said...

My own befuddled wardrobe encountered the same debate this morning! In the end we opted for a jean skirt with stripy knee high toe socks and mums ugh boots :)
Looks shpunky!
In such a sun-ripened yet breeze-whipped outfit I dished out scones & jam doughnuts for donations toward cancer research for Australia's Biggest Morning Tea.
Consequently was an hour late to this tute!
Melb-town visit in about 2wks! yewwwwww
x

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Stripy knee high toe socks! Clearly you've got it all going on, Alextricity. If you could just mention your sensible (and schmick) sock arrangement to the lasses down here, many a case of footblain could be averted.

As for jam doughnuts against cancer: it's a good thing jam doughnuts are well known for their anti-oxidant properties.

Karen, bon chance for the off-casting. With holes, it's not so much the quantity, but the quality. An apperture in the armpit is fine - and even desirable, for ventilation - but elsewhere has the potential to cause embarrassment.

JahTeh said...

I am about to give in and put the flannelette sheets on the bed. The fire is already on, but only because the geriatric cat (20) whines when he's cold.

Shelley said...

I wish I had a geriatric cat, or any cat at all, on which I could blame things.

I'm with Chesty on the toughing it out which is why I'm sitting in my living room with numb fingers...er...

[Fade out as I go and stroke my nice, warm, leather gloves.]

Shelley said...

Oh, and happy belated birthday.

Is it worth turing 29 or should I just have another 21st?

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Yay, Nails. You're back! The internet's missed you. Yeah, 29 doesn't seem so bad. I say gofrit.