Friday, 27 June 2008

Moving behaviour

I know it's been looking pretty quiet round here, but in fact what you've been not witnessing is the ultrasonic rumble of Lexicon Harlot vacating Hôtel Harlot (2 star accommodation for the peregrinating Sydneysider) and moving to Preston Heights (home to the Bourne's northernmost subterranean his-and-hers coordinating public toilets [did I mention?]). I would have notified the public earlier, only the internet won't be reaching Preston Heights until Tuesday. As soon as it does, there will be pictorial evidence, my oh my there will. Yes indeed.

In the meantime, rather than explaining how I managed to flood my bathroom within three hours of moving in on Wednesday morning, let me wax incredulical about the Starbucks logo.

This, citizens, is the Starbucks logo.

Even had I not mentioned that it be* the Starbucks logo, and even had you never seen the Starbucks logo before and/or identified it as the Starbucks logo, you could probably gather, here and now, just by looking at it, that it is, yes, the Starbucks logo. This, thanks to the word "Starbucks". And thanks to the word "Coffee", those of you unaquainted with the pre-frothed lolly-water that Starbucks merchandises will also deduce that Starbucks sells coffee. Thus far, the Starbucks logo is a paragon of relevance. But who, pray, is that sitting there in between the words "Starbucks" and "Coffee"? Is she, as I suspect, a mermaid with two tails, doing the splits, and wearing Sydney Opera House on her head? Or is she - I'm ready to be persuaded - a tousle-haired angler with an upside-down tuna in each hand? Either way, what is the relevance to coffee? Everyone knows coffee doesn't come from the sea. It grows underground.

* I am experimenting with the subjunctive mood. Please be patient.


eyrie said...

The idea of a mermaid doing the splits is surely enough to entertain the imagination for a very long time. I like to think she's doing the splits so she can give birth (to coffee machines, perhaps). Be careful with the subjunctive mood though, it's a gateway for the indicative (Boom tish).

rather than explaining how I managed to flood my bathroom within three hours of moving in on Wednesday morning

Now you're just teasing us! But I'm sure you'll make up for it by delivering on the promise of photos, in glorious profusion.

Martin Kingsley said...

I think they think it's a stylised siren of some kind. How clever they think they are. "Our 'coffee' is surely that good that it acts as a beacon for those without an obvious agenda, drawing them in from miles in every direction. Ho ho ho."

I spit at their collective metaphorical feet, like so. Ptoo.

old foghi said...

Harlot et al,

Coffee seems to think it is better than roller derby here in the home city.

old foghi

PS - enjoy your way of describing underground his/hers toilets, stone throws from the transit, glazers, and all things Harlotian(is this even a word? - it should be!)

old foghi said...

blasted modern invention!

olf doghi

Beth said...

It's a Moby Dick reference, yeah? Although I only read about every third chapter of that book, and I think I missed the mermaid.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Hello everyone! I love you all! Has anyone seen my noodles? I'm very hungry.

The Moby Dicksters are from Nantucket, yar? They no see Attle. (But maybe that was in the third I missed too.)

Anonymous said...

Starbuck is first mate on the Pequod, but he is not a mermaid of any kind.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

And what does being up to your elbows in sperm whale innards have to do with coffee?

TimT said...

It depends what sort of coffee you're drinkiing.