Dear Mrs I. M. Fair,
Yesterday your Australia Post Stamp Bulletin arrived in our letter box, and I took the liberty of leafing through it. According to Australia Post, 2007 will be the Year of the Pig. It will also be the Year of the Surf Lifesaver. This happy coincidence offers considerable scope for acknowledging pigs' oft ignored feats of altruism and derring-do.
Mrs Fair, I enjoy a good stamp myself - so much so that I intend to name my first born Philately - but don't you think it's time you branched out, started collecting something to really stretch your acquisitive talents? Noah managed TWO of EVERY animal species, that's 23760 ANTS ALONE, more than the total number of stamps released by the Commonwealth of Australia in its 93 years of stamp production.
"But I also collect pictorial postmarks", you'll say. Mrs Fair, it's that kind of lightweight attitude that's keeping this country down. Why be satisfied with pictorial postmarks when you can collect something truly stupendous, like famous walls? The Wailing Wall, the Great Wall of China, Hadrian's Wall, and the bits of widely dispersed rubble formerly known as the Berlin Wall: now that would be a collection I could respect.
Please send a forwarding address and we'll pass your Stamp Bulletin on.