Sunday, 25 February 2007

Wee happy few

"Heavy hearts, like heavy clouds in the sky, are best relieved by the letting of a little water." - Christopher Morley (1890-1957)

Christopher Morley was clearly a chap who understood the existential ache of a full bladder. Or maybe it's just that I've been re-reading Rousseau's Confessions, almost every page of which alludes to Jean-Jacques' difficulties with (a) the ladies, and (b) urine retention. The eighteenth-century catheter wasn't all it might have been.

All this reminds me of a sign that my dad, a fellow of impeccable decorum, pinned up above the outside loo some years before I was born. It declared, in sententious script, "All the water in this establishment has been passed by the management." I lived with that sign for fifteen years, and never once thought of Morley's heavy heart.

3 comments:

wool spaniel said...

Our local hairdresser is a very friendly young fellow of extremely high campness, who bemoans the inexplicable assumption by potential girlfriends that he must surely be gay. His haire shoppe has the following sign, in very cutesie floral script, adorning the loo:

If you sprinkle
While you tinkle
Be a sweetie
And wipe the seatie.

Just thought you would like to know.

alexis said...

Nice!

There is also, of course, the famous tale of the pharmacist and the customer surveying a suspicious puddle of liquid on the pharmacy floor. "H2O?" asked the customer. "K9P", quoth the pharmacist.

(Thanks again, Dad.)

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