Wednesday 2 September 2009

Introducing Schmarvard Harlot, my as yet unconceived progeny

Sigh. I am a blogger in name alone. If you've stopped by here lately, you will have heard nothing but the squeak-squeak of tumble weeds scratching their bellies on the rough bare blogular earth as they tumbled on down to the next port of all-out vacuity. And here's the bad news: it's not going to change any time soon. I am up to mine oxters in projects of a putting-the-wordsies-together nature, plus I am surrounded by so many A-grade industrial-strength procrastinatogens, that blogstering-as-recreation pales distinctly.

But here's a plan: I'm thinking of having a son. I want to call him Schmarvard. Schmarvard Harlot. If you can see any flaws in this scheme, point them out quickly.

8 comments:

genevieve said...

Make him a blog rather than a real son, as he might not be impressed by how little water we have when he grows up. Otherwise the name is a RIPPER.

You might also consider this captcha,
*pionsch*
(I swear I am not a spambot).

Fyodor said...

His nickname will be "Schmo", and not in a cool way.

Jayne said...

Ask yourself "what would the cats think about this turn of events?"

Ampersand Duck said...

I love your vision of blogosphere, which is very close to the ancient Greek vision of the afterlife, all flat plain with no horizons.

Would be great if Schmarvard grew up to go to Harvard. Or is that the point?

Anonymous Bosch said...

Somehow, I don't think Yale will want him. . .

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

So I see him as a riposte to the Harvard intext referencing system, which I have recently been required to require of my students, even though everybody knows English uses MLA or Chicago. I'm hoping Yale will love him, for just that reason -- though what's Yale got, besides the Beineke library, and the ghost of Derrida, and the ghost of J. Hillis Miller, and the ghost of - ew - Harold Bloom?

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Good points about the water and the cats. Shouldn't really be having sons when there's no water. Cats probably wouldn't mind him, so long as he's not a beagle. They don't seem very keen on beagles.

genevieve said...

Yale has a secret society with bones in it somewhere. THat has to be better than referencing, surely?