Saturday 7 July 2007

Vee Pees

The jury's still out on whether or not the Democratic People's Republic of Amerikay does good coffee, but there's no denying they do good vice-presidential nomenclature. Comrades, I give you Hubert Horatio Humphrey, Jr, after whom I would be proud to name - perhaps not my firstborn - but certainly any furred quadrupeds I or my descendents may in time husband. Take that, Deputy Prime Minister Mark "My Parents Couldn't Even Be Bothered Picking Something that Alliterates With My Surname" Vaile. Noone's going to name their guinea pig after you.

Lest you imagine that Hubert Horatio Humphrey, Jr., is a mere flash in the pan of appealingly named Americanian vice presidents, cast your ears over Hannibel Hamlin, Spiro T. Agnew, and Millard Fillmore. Even J. Danforth Quayle (expropriate the expropriators, I say) has a certain Republickerin' ring to it.

10 comments:

Pat said...

Generally, the veep runs cover for the prez, and in that there is advantage in having a comic figure in the role, a role Mr. Quayle played beautifully. He was, I think, the greatest in situ humorist of all time. While addressing an audience in the formerly sovreign kingdom of Hawai'i, he said

You all look like happy campers to me. Happy campers you are, happy campers you have been, and, as far as I am concerned, happy campers you will always be.

Unfortunately his brilliant parody of European condescension went completely unappreciated.

Oh Dan, we could use a veep like you now.

JahTeh said...

All I saw was 'Horatio' and started to drool, damn Hornblower and that Welsh crumpet.
My sister's cat is called Daisy Puss Tiddles P. which reminds me of several of our Parliamentarians.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Captain James Cook (better known round these parts for "discovering" the east coast of Australia) was speared to death for patronising Hawaiians. That was a couple of centuries ago and he only got what was coming, but still, you wouldn't catch me messing with that "happy campers" line.

(Okay. That anecdote supplied mostly to requite Jahteh's enthusiasm for officers of the British Royal Navy.)

Alextricity said...

love it :) alliteration is a gem!



....as is the name Horatio

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

I'll give you a dollar if you change your name to Horatio. Yes?

Anonymous said...

I prefer an amount of coffee to any number of senators, but would merely draw your attention (or awe your pretension) to Woodrow Wilson, Woodrow Wyatt, and Ronald Reagan. Australian pickings are somewhat slimmer, but there's always The First Viscount of Melbourne, Stanley Bruce. Not alliterative, but entertaining, nonetheless. Apparently quite a terrible Prime Minister.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

And Harold Holt.

Anonymous said...

By god, the chap sounds like he escaped from the mouldering and dubious pages of my own Notebook.

I, for one, think that the name Horatio is damned manly and sorely underused. My own grandfather's name was (the close cousin) Horace.

But then, what would you expect from a chap who, of his own free will, calls himself St John?

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Why! Nottlesby! Back from the dead! What a pleasing happenstance.

It is manly, isn't it? There's a reason why people don't name their daughters Horatia. (Or maybe they do?)

Anonymous said...

Yea verily have I cast off the Nazarine's winding-sheet of obscurity, rolled aside the rock of ignorance, and staggered, blinking, into the light of wit and wisdom.

As for Horatia, I think the last time it has been used (according to the wealth of knowledge in the R. A. St J. Nottlesby Memorial Library & Reading Rooms) was the late Nelson's daughter. I think it, too, should be brought back into wider circulation.

I've eaten too much dinner tonight.

(clearly)